We Didn’t Start the Fire

S01 — Session 34

1626, Fire Season

Season, Week, Day

1626, Fire Season, Harmony Week

Dramatis Personae




The Jedi Force Ghost of Nala’s Mother (in vision form)
A long suffering Rhigan Lhankor Mhy
An innocent duck
City Guards probably called something like Lau Rel, and Har Day
The Demi-Virge. Possibly.


No lecture: Exam week.

We start with the party splintered into almost as many places as possible1 Although it’s probably not wise to set challenges for the players. Dormal, Irillo and Sid settle into Rhigos, where Irillo is getting on with his legitimate business2 Selling a book of high class Lunar porn. Or possible a high class book of Lunar porn. Or maybe a class book of high Lunar porn. , while Dormal and his accomplice Devolin start their ‘legitimate business’ of scouting out to find the girl who ran away to Rhigos with something which might not have been hers. Dormal was unsuccessful, but unfortunately, Devolin was not. This is unfortunate, as it attracted the attention of the Powers that Be, and things being as they are, guards were sent to have a Word. Devolin, with his usually finely tuned sense for when things are going pear shaped leapt out of the window, and escaped, leaving Dormal to face the music.

Nala delivered the Unicolts back to her tribe and then had a vision suggesting she should return to Sartar and her Destiny.

Varanis, Serala, Finarvi, Rajar and Berra considered what to do next, and how to fill the gaps in their group. They asked Tennebris, who revealed he had divined on the issue, and advised them to get the group which had actually quested on Kero Finn back together to seek the best chances. Realising that they needed to subdivide further, Varanis, Serala and Finarvi headed south via Duck Point towards Nochet and Rhigos to get their Eurmali and their spare Issaries back, while Berra, D’Val and Rajar headed into Prax to fetch Nala back.

Dormal found himself in the palace dungeons, and tried escaping, largely to keep himself amused, but unexpectedly efficient guarding and then interrogation led to him realising he had been well and truly made, and then being kicked out with a warning that the price of the Demivirge to hand over the diadem was being made Queen of Nochet (and therefore Esrolia). He left Rhigos at speed comparable to that of Devolin, and headed back to Nochet by sea.

Meanwhile, after unexpectedly smooth travelling, Berra, Rajar and D’Val had headed into Prax, acquired a spare Bison for Rajar (and tried teaching D’Val to ride), and met up with Nala, to bring her back, and after a meeting with Granny, Varanis, Serala and Finarvi headed off by road towards Rhigos.

“Wild West Country. Los of sheep rustling.” – Berra
“I’ve got a giant mechanical combine harvester, and I’ll give you the key.” – Berra

“Built more with adobe? Are there lots of acrobats?” – Varanis
“Yes, Varanis. Or at least contortionists” – GM
“They wrap around poles a lot.” – Berra

“Devolin launched himself through the window…” – GM
“I shall act surprised…because I’m…surprised.” – Dormal

“Sir, are you with that duck?” – Guard
“No, I’m here.” – Dormal
“Do you follow the god of entertainers?” – Guard
“No.” – Dormal
“Why do you think you’re a comedian then?” – Guard

“My bet’s on Devolin. All six of him by now.” – Nala

“…leather jerkin.” – GM
“What is the jerk in?” – Berra
@@*@@holds out fist to camera@@*@@ – GM
@@*@@runs head into camera@@*@@ – Berra

“What are you doing?” – GM
“We should probably tell Rajar what’s going on.” – Berra
“I was going to say Sense Chaos and cast berserk…” – Rajar

“Is D’Val here?” – Berra
“Ith he invited?” – GM
“Yeth.” – Berra
“But without lisping when I do.” – Berra

“Then yes, he’s there, picking his fingernails.” – GM
“Hith thfingernailth?” – Nala

“Did I miss anything important?” – Varanis
“No, only you talking.” – Berra

“Much as I hate to say it, for the best chance of success we should avoid Snakepipe Hollow.” – Rajar
“One does not grasp victory by attacking the enemy at their strongest point. You charge them from the flank.” – Rajar

“Free stabbings all round.” – Dormal

“It seems to me that you’re a little short.” – D’Val

“Demi-verge: runs along half of the highway?” – Nala
“Demi-verge: So Very Nearly?” – Nala
“Demi-verging on truth?” – Nala

“It was thome other Duck! I’m not the Duck you’re looking for!” – Probably not Devolin
“Well, that Duck sounds like he knows what he’s talking about.” – Dormal

“If you aren’t the Duck we’re after, why are you still running away?” – Guard
“Sorry, I can’t hear you. I’m too busy running away…” – Devolin

“Not unlike the British Museum in air.” – GM
“Which is good, because I’m looking for stolen stuff” – Dormal

“Truth, Stasis, and Death.” – GM
“I don’t like this place!” – Dormal

“A female mandarin Duck.” – GM
“Are you COMPLETELY SURE you caught the RIGHT DUCK?” – Lhankor Mhy Sage
“I don’t know sir. They all look the same to me!” – Guard

“I’ve never seen this Human before in my life! What do you want me to accuse him of?” – Probably Not Devolin

“She was a Duck, sir. In the right quarter of town, at the right time!” – Guards

“So you suspect the Duck was being paid?” – Sage
“I was paying the Duck. I think that’s pretty obvious by now.” – Dormal

“Re borrowing a trickster: Hi, Prince we’re sort of insurging against… can we borrow your official traitor?” – Dormal
“We’re not insurging. We’re helping!” – Berra

“I’m glad you still remember something I taught you.” – Nala’s mother
“I kneel.” – Nala

“How are you? Besides dead?” – Nala

“Let’s ask Kallyr for the other people we need.” – Varanis
“Fair enough. But ‘let us’ is you.” – Berra

“Sartar doesn’t have a coastline.” – GM
“What a stupid place!” – Nala

“You wake up.” – GM
“I go back into the temple and give them a hundred more lunars.” – Nala

“Chains hanging from the wall, whips…” – GM
“I like what you’ve done with the place.” – Dormal

“Sooo. What time is Breakfast?” – Dormal
“The door slams, and locks.” – GM

“I divined on this. Do you want the good news, or the bad news?” – Tennebris
“I’d rather like to have both, please.” – Varanis
“Go-ood…” – Tennebris

“I could meditate on it.” – Varanis
“I think you’ve done quite enough meditation for now.” – Tennebris

“So, essentially, my mother shows up WHEN I COULD NOT BE FARTHER FROM SARTAR and points me there. Cheers, Ma.” – Nala
“Well you never write.” – Dormal

“There’s always room for two on Billy.” – Rajar
“Is that a euphemism…? ” – Nala
“YES!” – Rajar

“I’m not sure Prax is known for its Duck Population…” – GM
“It’s about to be.” – Berra

“Irillo was in a robe.” – Berra
“But not one that shows off his breasts.” – Berra

“WooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooT!” – Rajar
“Pack beer and lances” – Rajar

@@*@@tries to get word in edgeways@@*@@ – GM

“If Tom doesn’t want the party split, stop having my unicorn shag things.” – Nala
“Nooo, he loves it when the party is split!” – Berra
“You can see the tears of joy in his little face.” – Berra

“Why…?” – probably the demivirge
“But it’s hard to tell, because of the blindfold.” – Berra

“I have plenty of whips.” – GM
“Oh thank Vinga it’s Nala who needs to be on screen right now.” – Varanis
“You’re allowed to mute your speakers, burn the computer down, and leave the country.” – Berra

“While I am in Prax try and find a female Bison to take home with us as pack animal and ……friend….for Billy” – Rajar
“Awww!” – Berra

“Rajar is a Billy lover.” – Varanis
“Waaait, did he INSPIRE himself with Billy Love?” – Berra

“Rajar is just an animal lover. Just ask Kalis.” – Nala

“We should get D’Val a Bison.” – Berra
“Because he can climb onto them.” – Berra
“We should get D’Val an ostrich.” – Dormal

“Why’ve you got a little pet bird?” – Bison
“We’re on a quest. It’s a long story.” – Rajar
“Yeth, it’th a long story.” – D’Val

“He’s like a hunting falcon. You can set him on people.” – Rajar
“Caw. Caw.” – D’Val

“Nala says nothing, pointedly. but she says it in Praxian.” – Nala

“Finarvi is super impressed with the snake.” – Finarvi
“It’s like there are no boobs in the room.” – Finarvi

“Ask him. It is only polite. He’s been in since the beginning, pretty much. And was recognised on Kero Finn by Argan Argor.” – Nala

“Find Irillo, you find Sid.” – Nala
“Well, yes. And we’re not in Esrolia, as you may have noticed.” – Berra

“Does she require anything further from us at this point?” – Varanis
“Less of the ‘us’ please!” – Serala

“Don’t judge a girl by the size of her dagger, I’ve told you before.” – Serala
“I’m not judging the size, I’m judging the quality.” – Finarvi

“The Bison Tribe? It’s hard to tell them apart! They’re all about SIZ 23…” -Nala

  • 1
    Although it’s probably not wise to set challenges for the players.
  • 2
    Selling a book of high class Lunar porn. Or possible a high class book of Lunar porn. Or maybe a class book of high Lunar porn.