The Hole of the Moon

S01 — Session 23

1626, Sea Season

Season, Week, Day

1626, Sea Season, Harmony week Fireday

Dramatis Personae


Varanis daughter of Serzeen, of House Saiciae
Xenofos, of House Saiciae
Tiwr- Played en Troupe


The Grandmother of House Saiciae
Serzeen, Lieutenant of the Guard of House Saiciae
Eranda, Pet Humakti of House Saiciae, and perky goth
Erinalartha, Pet Scribe of House Saiciae,
Lanasha, ex-pet Vinga
Koraki Silverhand
A chorus of Cheery Lunar Initiates, some of whom survived


As before, the log will be recounted with extracts from Berra JarangsdottiHumaktisaga, from The Lay of Serala, Lance of the Cold Sun , The Death of Rajar, and NalaTiwrSaga. As with last time there will be extracts from the Sonnets to Varanis, and also The Sonnets to Mellia, Sweetest of Healers, White Lady of Esrolia, additionally, we will be seeing the Sonnets in Praise of Xenofos. Editorial commentary will be recorded [thus]. Both the {“D”} and “T” voice appear in this selection of extracts.

[Greetings. I trust you all enjoyed and indeed survived your Winter Festivals of your choice. This is the last lecture of the year, and I promised you a treat. So, here we are, the various relative versions of The Battle of Nochet. I wonder if you would care to put a small wager or two on how, precisely, various poems will differ. Let us begin with the Sonnets to Varanis.]

Girding gilded gold1Charrington, in her usual sardonic fashion, observes that here the poet was clearly either hiccuping or was drunk as the proverbial unicorn. See., e.g., Catullus 27 ( rapier to her waist,
and clenching Spear and shield in fearsome haste
Varanis called her noble allies bold
That Lunars part of ancient Nochet hold

Her passion called unto her Goddess strong
To strike and slay this taint of chaos’ wrong
Thus God inspired she called her heroes band
To be as weapon in her awesome hand

Her lawful anger rent the very air
But all her men she plac’d with ice cold care!
Before her hand, bronze bound oak split like naught
And in her anger, Red Bound foes were caught!

Like unto dervish struck her mighty band
First Rajar bull carv’d axe in muscled hand
Then Berra, like a cold avatar of death
And Serzeen, fighting wasting ne’er a breath!

Serala as a beauteous war’ior queen,
Xenofos, sword writing hist’ry as it’s seen
Dormal, a sharp eye’d guide to warfare’s art
Lanasha, dear to Vinga’s noble heart

And flying o’er the battlefield below
Koraki, we in other sonnets know
But best of all, is Vinga’s greatest Lord
Who purgテΛd all of Nochet with her sword!

[If we compare this with another pro-Saiciae narrative, Sonnets in Praise of Xenofos we see a lot in common, although Xenofos gives rather more detail.]

Brave Xenofos2There is no direct evidence to support the hypothesis that the Xenofos named in the sonnets would be the author Xenofos whose lost history The Fall has been paraphrased by later historians of late Lunar Empire. stood forth his armour bright
His3A male protagonist in Esrolian warrior poetry might indicate that males occasionally had a more significant role in military affairs than hitherto assumed by the majority of scholars. Whether said Xenofos is representative of a larger male warrior group ignored by other sources in matriarchal society, a break in the societal and cultural norms of his day or – most likely – sarcastic critique of the values of Esrolian hero poetry, ridiculing their normal protagonists and their ideology by carnivalistically presenting the most unlikely hero possible, remains subject to further study and even then, due to the fragmentary nature of our sources, may regrettably not be conclusively solved. wisdom’s gleam a beacon in the night!
He stood against the men of fourth cohort
And when the Bull was struck he bravely fought!

Alone, like brave Humakt on the gate he fought
He soared as well as any Orlanth sought!
And landed light as any feather’s kiss
And show’d himself aware of battle’s bliss!

As sign of which the dread Gods warm embrace
Was shar’d with Berra in that rising place
And she, prostrate before his fighting skill
Entreat’d him rest, and take a moment still4This verse is highly debated as it seems entirely out of character for the Berra of Berra JarangsdottiHumaktisaga. Of course, that saga is thought to consist of an enormous amount of hyperbole..

[So far, so fairly typical. However, if we continue and examine The Lay of Serala, Lance of the Cold Sun we see a not unusual disparity.]

By magic lunars into Nochet came, with many a regiment of mighty men
How came they there? It lies without a God loveing priestess’ ken
But there they stood, in fortress of a magic shell
Which risked to make the city from a heaven into hell!

Serala like a great colossus stood, and urged
The queen that this pus filled abscess then by purged!
Her lance would cleanse it, and her blade divide
The secret cords behind which evil moonlords hide!

Like sunbeam she strode into the fort ahead
Her angry stares alone did strike a dozen dead!
With sword she laid low twice a score before
The beast Onjur lunged out from ‘neath the floor!

“Beware!” yelled Dormal, with his only breath
Before the Redlord struck him near to death!
But his cry was all that Cold lance needed
And her great blow showed his warning heeded!

{“Watch out! He’s c…. bleuh.”}

Great it was, but great his sword swung right back
And whilst her sword was part turned by iron tack
His bit deep, and cursing to her knee she fell
And yet he feared her skill would send him down to hell

And so he fled her anger keen and flew against her friends
But they inspired by Cold Lance would make him end
And so, his henchmen in their dozen slain before
They turned their swords ‘pon him, drenched in Gore.

So craven fled he, clutched to his Whore Goddess breast
Whereas Nochet was by Yelmalio’s cool hand bless’d
For where Serala led the righteous furiou’s fray
All opposition, all fortresses, before her melt away!

[If we compare these, we see themes, but there are relatively few points in common. This is exacerbated if we bring in Berra JarangsdottiHumaktisaga]

Lunar Lair Lurks
Leeching life from land
Bold Berra bravely
Bore biting blade

Past paingiving portal
Pacing into Pelorian post
Giving guardians gore
Gift of God’s Good Healing5 This is presumably ironic, as Berra’s God was Humakt, his good healing may well be death.

[Naturally, Rajar’s response in The Death of Rajar is rather more terse]

Calling Berserking
But your foe flees by Goddess,
Utterly Runed

[So, how did Dormal survive this encounter with a Scimitar Lord, I hear you ask? Well, we might expect to see our answer in The Sonnets to Mellia, Sweetest of Healers, White Lady of Esrolia, but this seems not to be the case, for if Dormal was indeed ‘struck near to death’, then we find the following in Mellia’s sonnets.]

Into war’s red cruel wrack and ruined gore
Strode Mellia, White balm to wounds as before
Past Onjur, unfearing called to dire need
Where Dormal slept, Serala’s bright blood bleed

She heal’d the Lance, and bade the Storm Bull sleep
And at the death and losses, later weep
But now White Lady as the people call
She strode to heal them as they bleeding fall//

[Meanwhile, Nala appears to have been busy in an academic setting, which is an odd juxtaposition for a presumably illiterate Praxian proto-shaman.]

Nala goes hunting.
Oath-sworn, information comes
from prune-faced priestess.

Perched on a chair, her
intelligence undisguised,
she watches and guides.

The earth窶冱 presence bound
in her body; the long wait
to bring truth to ground.

[One assumes she went without her mount.]

“Alllllll by myseeeellllllf. Don’ wanna be….. Allllll by myseeeeeeeeeeeelf.

After doing the dance of the –nine veils– imminent slaughter to assist Berra’s Morale ritual, Nala headed off to the Great Library, with Grandmother’s pet scribe, Erinalartha, only revealing to the latter that they were after secrets that the Lunars would kill to keep afterwards. There they settled in with a priestess with something of a resemblance to a raisin, who unaccountably found Cha 40 Nala pleasing company.

Meanwhile, Xenofos Saiciae, Varanis’ wastrel cousin, stepped out to go hunting, and encountered Tiwr in the stables. A pleasing discussion ensued, with Xenofos doubting his sanity, an opinion which was shared by Tiwr. Still, Tiwr got wine, and left alone with a stable half filled with mares, as Xenofos was summoned away by Eranda, the perky Humakti blonde, to see Grandmother.

Grandmother reminded Xenofos of the nice armour the family had provided for his heroic deeds. She then suggested he might ‘be a dear’ and help Varanis with her task. Xenofos agreed with the blithe assurance of someone who had no particular idea what he was agreeing to, and met up with the others, where they were joined by the General of the Queen of Nochet, with her own people, and Serzeen.

After discussion it was agreed that the General and her people would hit the main –Palazzo– –Inn– fortress being used by the Lunars, whilst Varanis and her team would hit the most likely building to be the destination of a ratrun (essentially acting as a tower outwork from the main fort).

As Nala left, the others watched Berra try and make breakfast into a ritual, and then fall into a shuddering stop (ruining the ritual) when Lanasha turned up, accompanied by Koraki.

Rajar and Berra approached the front door, with Rajar starting to axe for admission, before Serzeen called a gnome, and converted it into a Gargoyle to burst the door at the frame, whereupon Rajar, Berra, Serzeen, Xenofos, Serala and Dormal piled in, splitting up to search the building more messily. Meanwhile Koraki and Lanasha flew in the top, and Varanis jumped in.

All the entrants found that there was a warding on the house, albeit a somewhat weak one. Dormal and Serala found someone at a disadvantage in the latrines, and chopped his legs to bits (and in one case, off). Berra and Serzeen found a rather more prepared guardsman who took a touch more killing, and Rajar (followed by Xenofos) charged up the stairs, to confront a couple of spearmen holding the 1st floor hatchway. At the top of the building Lanasha and Varanis leapt in, to confront two swordsmen, whilst Koraki waited, hovering as mobile reserve (and looking splendid with the air ruffling his hair).

Rajar swiftly disposed of one of the spearmen, but then opted to disarm the other by impaling himself on his spear. this was less successful than he anticipated. Taking advantage of the lack of spear in his face, Xenofos followed up and invited the Lunar to surrender. Sadly, he was less than convincing, and ended up facing a scimitar instead. As Berra climbed the stairs to join him, the Lunar kicked Xenofos down the stairs, taking Berra with him to the ground. This left a badly injured Rajar alone at the top of the stairs with the Lunar. Quickly calling on his God, Rajar healed himself, just in time to avoid an attack, and then set up an absolutely spectacular head shot on the Lunar… who vanished in a Scarlet mist of Divine Intervention. The lower floors cleared of Lunars, this left only Lanasha and Varanis duelling their respective Lunars on the top floor. A Xena leap by Varanis looked spectacular, and would have been more so, but he’d missed the bit about leaving his gorget off, so her attempt to cut his throat bounced off his armour, but presumably he so impressed by this air bending, he failed to spot her running her broadsword in low under his guard to take him through the abdomen.

Attracted by a certain amount of trouble and violence, Mellia rushed into the tower, to heal.

Dormal and Serala took to searching the ground floor, and Dormal found a trapdoor, which they opened, just in time to meet Onjur coming the other way. This caused a certain amount of mutual irritation, especially when Dormal shrugged off Onjur’s first Mindblast. A second did the job, however, and with only a casual incapacitation of Serala’s leg, Onjur made for the door- meeting Serzeen and Berra coming in the opposite direction. Fortunately by the time he came through the door to meet them, there were two of him to cause distraction and delay. He got bogged down trying to force his way through Berra and Serzeen and Xenofos (and indeed had another mindblast bounce off Berra’s mindshield), and eventually had to Divine intervention out, as Rajar berserked, and Koraki approached from the outside, having flown down the outside of the tower.

This, naturally left our heroes (and a brief illusionary Onjur) to deal with a berserking Rajar. Fortunately after Berra attempted to take ‘disarming’ a little literally, Mellia once again whammied Rajar, before getting on with healing the injured, and our heroes could take a breath at last. It seemed their assault had gone significantly better than that at the main palazzo, which had been better defended, and had much heavier wardings, as well as an annoyed Lune.

Meanwhile, Nala and her research team had found….. <to be continued>

*GM added Rajar to the group.*
*Rajar left the group.*
“Rajar has BillyBrains tonight.” – Serala
“Could you re-add him please, GM?” – Serala
“Hahahah.” – Berra

“To be fair (although as I just said to Nala, never be fair to Rajar)…” – Serala

*Middle finger* – GM, 30 seconds after game start
“Yaaay, I win!” – Berra

“Hm. Wearing headset with earrings is painful.” – Nala

“How locked-down is the house?” – Berra
“Apparently not very locked down.” – Varanis

“What窶冱 all the clicking?” – Varanis

“Your horse has been moved! In it place is one belonging to the foreigners. They’ve left the spiked chamfron on….” – GM
*sigh* “Damned barbarians. I’ll go closer.” – Xenofos
“The metal support part is missing. Probably invisible.” – GM

“Tiwr gives Xenofos side-eye. ‘I don窶冲 stare at YOU when you are eating.'” – Nala
“… I pinch myself. I’m awake.” – Xenofos

“Tiwr likes wine.” – Varanis
“Tiwr may be immune to the poisoned stuff.” – Berra

“Do we let him near the mares after he’s had wine?” – Serala
“Keep him away from my horses!” – Varanis
“Come to that, do we let him near the mares before he’s had wine..?” – Serala

“I’ll grin an amphora.” – Xenofos
“Bring a bucket!” – Tiwr

“Ah. Prax. Or Pranks, as it should be pronounced.” – Xenofos

“Horn comes off. Other horn underneath.” – Berra
*wincing laugh* – GM

“I窶冦 resisting the urge to pull on the horn.” – Xenofos

“Eranda the Perky Goth” – Nala
“Perky Gothic Death Cultist” – Rajar

“Tiwr: Nobody knows the troubles I’ve seeeeeen.” – Berra

“Thingummy from Withnail and I. … Richard E Grant.” – GM
“Withnail, in fact.” – Berra

“Grandmother is horrifying.” – Berra
“Terrifying.” – Varanis
“I love her to bits and find her neither.” – Nala

“I guess I should unmute.” – Varanis
“Maaaaybe.” – Berra

“Serala, stop snorting the kitty.” – Nala
“It’s not optional. She’s an addict.” – Rajar
“You are supposed to inject kitties.” – Nala

“Your wish is my command, honoured grandmother.” – Xenofos
“I know.” – Grandmother

“Objection! GM asking the ‘how bad could it be’ question.” – Berra

“What is the scribe窶冱 name?” – GM
“Serzeen obviously.” – GM
“I窶冦 going to kill you.” – Ari.
“Erinalartha.” – GM
“I pulled up the random name generator for the next time someone is so crass as to ask the GM for preparation.” – Berra

“Are you taking your noble steed with you?” – GM
“No, because he can’t read either, and I wouldn’t want him to graze on the books.” – Nala

“I apologise for my cat trying to pull my clothes off.” – Serala
“If I were not sure I had already seen a movie like that, I’m sure there’d be a market for it.” – GM

“I’d wave Teeny at the camera to meet Varanis’ cat, but as Tury is sitting right behind my webcam, the outcome could be unfortunate….” – Serala
“Is Teeny a euphemism for— SHUT UP BERRA” – Berra

“Nala wins at winning!” – Berra

“Lhankor-Mytes.” – GM

“Crap.” – Varanis

“She’s not so much sharpening her sword, which is very sharp already, as cuddling the edge with a sharpening stone.” – Berra

*description of Rajar and his many axes* – Rajar
“I might make an educated guess on the cult.” – Xenofos

“Half Esrolian 3/4 weasel …it’s Dormal.” – Rajar

“The Humakti is grinning a lot.” – Berra
“Like a shark” – Nala

“Xenofos is breaking up for me.” – Varanis
“Everyone breaks up for me on and off, it’s my normal status. It’s my excuse for why I look blank so often…” – Serala

“Rajar has a number of facial scars. Some from weapons or claws and some ritual. He has a Death Rune on his forehead” – Rajar

“I always forget runes. Serala has none visible. Slacker.” – Serala

*mimes killing people* – Berra
“What are you *doing*?” – Varanis
“Miming killing people.” – Berra
“Stabby stabby? Excellent.” – Rajar

“‘Ohhhhh, weren窶冲 you ever on the CONGO RIVER? Blow, man, blow…’ comes a loud warble from the courtyard.” – Nala

“Rajar don窶冲 forget your Really Good Beer” – Nala
“Have a beer!” – Rajar
“Barbarians drink beer!” – Xenofos
“Yes, and I am a barbarian!” – Rajar

“Rajar has a pint. Berra has a half pint.” – Berra
“She still has more in ratio.” – Berra

“We’ll be tooled up and we’ll wait until summoned.” – Berra
“Axe juggling time!!! Sid?” – Rajar
“No. No axe juggling. And no juggling Sid either.” – Berra
“Axes AND Sid.” – Varanis

“Berra’s got a spear and a compound bow ready to strap onto her back.” – Berra

“Berra will help strap him in.” – Berra
“So kind of you, Berra.” – Varanis

*image of Brian Blessed with wings* – “Rajar pretty much” – Rajar
“No wings.” – GM
“Those aren’t wings. That’s an axe.” – Dormal

“Am I missing something about male-female relations here? I think Serala ignores everyone equally…” – Serala
“.. women can lord it (lady it) over others.” – Berra
“Esrolia is very very matriarchalllllllll.” – Rajar
“Men are too emotional, poor darlings.” – GM

“Particularly useless kind of man.” – Varanis
“Varanis, you’re a cruel woman. I like it…” – Serala

“Oh, Berra WILL mention that the General is going to be arriving, and the briefing can happen then. Now breathe in, this bit has to tighten.” – Berra

“Varanis, Rajar might be a dashing felllow but he is a foreigner, and than again I don’t need too much info – pointy end toward enemy.” – Xenofos
“Ah, pride. How it cometh before a fall…” – Serala
“Berra winces at Xenofos. ‘No. You’re going to need to listen. This is bad.'” – Berra

*dances stories* – Nala
“Gossiping about your mother, Nala!” – Varanis
“Varanis. Yes, my mother THE HERO!” – Nala

“He is pre-planned and hard as nails.”- Berra

“It’s her plan; we mustn’t mess with it.” – Berra, according to Nala unaware of irony

“With a clash of arms and boots, the General marches in.” – GM
“Berra stands up slightly straighter.” – Berra
“Wave happily at her.” – Rajar
“Serala continues lounging against the wall. She may refrain from making snarky comments though. Perhaps.” – Serala
*bows deeply, showing great respect in introduction* – Varanis
“Stop groveling, Saiciae. Straighten up.” – General
*blort of laughter* – Berra

“She’s not as fat as Rajar…” – GM
“Hard to be as fat as Rajar.” – Berra
“True Facts.” – Rajar

“He’s paid good money for that gut.” – Serala
“I work hard at this physique.” – Rajar
“He’s going to wear it with PRIDE!” – Serala
*drinks* – Rajar

“Main doors on Harbour Street. Secondary door on Dormal Street. It says it’s an inn. The Queen’s Watchers say they’ve never seen anyone renting it.” – Berra

“Local Lore?” – Berra
“Maybe inspired by Love of Eurmal?” – Berra
“Usually, Devotion to Eurmal, unless his relationship to the God is a lot closer than we’ve been lead to believe.” – GM

“I’m trying to school my expression, but my pride is stung.” – Varanis

“I should note that I rolled a special originally to know about the palazzo” – Dormal
“Oh yes!” – GM

“There’s also a description of Onjur – iron breastplate and sword. Moon, Truth, and Death runes. That last bit seems to piss Berra off a lot.” – Berra

“You got a look from the general – you know that look Nala gives the wolf when he’s done something well? – GM to Dormal

“Not that I doubt your judgement Berra but he is that low. He’s not a warrior he’s…a….Politician.” – Rajar

“Berra seems to be treating Xenofos as a … Human.” – Berra

“Berra is attempting the straight face again.” – Berra
*kick Berra on the ankle if required* – Serala

“Rajar is now drinking from the barrel as we seem to be all out of cups.” – Rajar

“My character sheet got corrupted, I’ve lost all my modifiers on it. This may take some screaming to fix.” – Serala

“Berra is loud. She’d take a glance as permission to talk.” – Berra

“She canna take it, cap’n!” – Serala

“I’ve failed at the ritual, though. Damnit.” – Berra
“But not a fumble.” – Berra

“She can dance if you want her to.” – Varanis

“During the ritual you get to tell people about yourself, what you’re good at…” – Berra
“DRINKING AND HITTING PEOPLE WITH THIS AXE. And this one. And this one” – Rajar

“I said I should have gone to the Storm Bull hall!” – Rajar

“Too bad D’Val couldn’t make it.” – Varanis

“I missed all of that except ‘more wine’.” – Varanis

“Broad frikin daylight Hooooooooooooooooooooorah” – Rajar

“Moon is Empty Half. Red magic will be bad to face but not terrible.” – Berra
“Not as bad as when it’s full.” – Berra

“All lunar spells available and freely stackable.” – Berra
“But not maximised…” – Berra

“Berra is match-making.” – Varanis

“I’m rather wondering how I ended up leaving my own troop behind? Wtf. Ego is a bitch.” – Varanis

“Walls are more than 1m thick?” – Varanis

“Shield (2 points), 04. Sword Trance with 9 points of magic backing it. 22.” – Berra
“There had better be some action here now.” – Berra

“Find enemy – with truth?” – Xenofos
“Biiiiig thumbs up to Xenofos.” – Berra

“I am become Death, Destroyer of Men.” – Berra

“Well we have a commander.” – Xenofos
“Berra.” – Berra
“There’s Serzeen too.” – Varanis

“Cast it on me. I’ll make the calls if I have to.” – Berra

“Find Enemy.” – Berra

“Go, Rajar.” – Berra
“Oooh.” – Berra
“Are there people behind the door yet?” – Berra

“I believe in you Rajar.” – Varanis

“Varanis. Do you have any magical armour?” – GM
“It’s pretty!” – Varanis

“Waiting first round to see Berra and Rajar go in – follow in next wave.” – Xenofos
“I’m offering to let Serzeen go first, but she’ll have to be quick.” – Berra

“Jump after Lanasha.” – Varanis
“Shield up, small axe in hand.” – Varanis

“I’ve given target info to people. You know approximately where the PEOPLE are, but not the ways there.” – Berra
“And Xenofos can do the same.” – Berra

“Makes sense to be 100% sure each floor is clear though.” – Serala
“We never like people coming from behind… :wink:” – Serala
“That’s what the magic on us is for.” – Berra
“Magic, pfft. :smile:” – Serala
“I missed the smut in a comment from Serala yesterday, and replied straight, and now I am covered in shame.” – Berra

“HEROIC!” – Berra

“Dormal and Serala, you have just stumbled into a latrine.” – GM
*guy with trousers down pulls scimitar*
“Sensibly, I’m going to try to chop his head off.” Serala, opting not to grapple
“WORKS FOR ME.” – Berra

“My sword skill is 185%. Not sure it’s enough.” – Berra

“How did it get that high?!” – Varanis
*pats Death rune* – Berra

“Humakt is the god of Death, and that’s a rune shaped like a sword.” – Berra

“1+1+1+1. 4. Unless I have more.” – Berra

“It’s Mellia! Just when we all took some damage. Mellia, my friend. :smile:” – Serala

“Did You say Mallia?” – Xenofos
“Mellia. I hope.” – Serala

“Don’t run onto the spears!” – Varanis
“If you lead, I’ll hit over your head, I’ve got a great axe!” – Rajar
“I’m letting you go first.” – Xenofos

“You need to watch out for the bards… Hang around and do almost nothing, you can be a war heroine. Hang around at the back and you might be the Monty Python Brave Sir Robin…” – Serala

“If I have to, I’ll get to the sound rather than the sense of where the enemies are. “WHERE ARE THE BASTARDS?”” – Berra
“If it works!” – Berra

“I was planning on leading this expedition, not on fighting it!” – Xenofos

“Narrow staircase- difficult to dodge anyway” – Varanis

“Hits to head can just be re-rolled. He’s hit – it’s just about where.” – Berra
“Chop his toes off.” – Varanis

*rolls massive damage* – Rajar
“<3 rajar” – Berra
“Sever the leg!” – Varanis
“Good job Sid’s not here. He might be suffering PTSD.” – Serala

*eats crisps with mic on* – Berra
“Sorry, was crunching loudly.” – Berra

“Don’t forget to search the body when you are done with him, Serala !” – Varanis
“The Lunar, or Dormal…? 0_0” – Serala

“And the sword gets stuck in him a LOT.” – Berra

“That latrine is going to be very messy. Blood splatter everywhere!” – Varanis
“Pity the cleaners.” – Berra

“I now search Dormal for clues….” – Serala

“Point Serzeen in the right direction, listen for the loudness.” – Berra

“Lanasha: hovers perfectly” – Berra

“Yeah, that’s an impale. Are you dodging that?” – GM
“I’m going to give it a damned good go.” – Rajar

“I hold onto the spear, and run it backwards at him.” – Rajar
“FREE SPEAR!” – Berra

“Mellia, you came with us to the tower attack, right?” – Berra
“I thought so, but GM might have parked me at Irillo’s funeral.” – Mellia

“Noooo. I’m sure he said…” – Serala
“:heart: Mellia” – Serala

“You might be outside, but there’s a lot of shouting.” – Berra
“YIELD, YEW RASCAL!” – Xenofos in very posh accent

“I think the accent is why my intimidation roll failed.” – Xenofos

“MAKE A WAY!” – Berra
*keeps fighting* – Xenofos

“If there’s a lot of shouting, Mellia will put up Shimmer 1 and then get in there.” – Mellia
“Did I mention…. :heart: Mellia?” – Serala

“Do I get to dodge the falling guy?” – Berra

*misses wildly* – Xenofos
“I can see why he is not intimidated.” -Xenofos

“War face!” – Berra

“I saw knees!” – Varanis
“I tried to spare you that, but wasn’t quick enough, I do apologise!!!” – Serala
“I missed knees?” – GM
“Dormal? Show your knees.” – Berra
“But I’d have to take my jeans off.” – Dormal
“GM insists. It’s the rules.” – Berra
“Well. OK THEN!” – Dormal

“Let’s do the Serzeen-Serala bondage scene OFF camera.” – GM
“No. No no nonono!” – Serala
“On camera!” – Serala

“Xenofos failed, I believe.” – Berra
“Knocked back down the stairs. Ouch.” – Varanis

“Oh, I didn’t expect the stairs to be so soft.” – Xenofos, falling down the stairs into Berra

“Dormal, downstairs, feels an unexpected glow of warmth.” – Dormal

“Mellia, you hear the Clown March played inside the building.” – Berra

“LEAP OVER HIM.” – Berra
“Ceiling: I have other ideas.” – Berra

“Koraki: Waves down at his fans, lets the wind ruffle his cloak.” – Berra

“CLANG!” – Berra

“What is Koraki doing anyway? Leaving me and Lanasha to fight these two Lunars alone?” – Varanis
“Well, you’re grown-ups, Varanis.” – Berra
“If he stepped in that would be an insult.” – Berra

“But Dormal has so much practice at searching, can’t take him long.” – Serala
“Searching, hiding, backstabbing… all that sort of thing.” – Serala

“Ouch.” – Mellia takes damage.

“Xenofos. You’re spending the round casting heal.” – GM
“Well. Trying to cast heal…” – Xenofos
“I have failed.” – Xenofos

*megaphone hands* – Berra

“Which side are you on, Dormal?” – ???
“Obviously the side of order and rules.” – Berra

“Bugger.” – Rajar
“It’s wrong for the wife to smirk at this point, isn’t it?” – Serala
“Yes. She should be laughing out loud.” – Berra

“How agile am I while jumping with the rune spell on? As in, can I turn around whilst jumping?” – Varanis

“He won’t let me take an axe to re-enact the blow.” – Serala
“He’s no fun.” – Serala
“Poor Serala. So put upon.” – Varanis
“Doesn’t understand his place as a man.” – Varanis
“I need to educate him in the Nochet way of doing things, clearly.” – Serala

“As you connect, he disappears, in a red nimbus.” – GM
“Divine Intervention!” – Berra
“I thought read nimbus was just way of saying red spray everywhere” – Xenofos
“No, he got carried away.” – Berra

“Vinga!” – Xenofos
“Not Xena!” – Xenofos
*cheerleads* – Serala

*fails to remove head with called shot* – Varanis
“She is not D’Val.” – Berra

“Luckily this isn’t a job for regrow limb. Yet.” – Mellia

“Poor Xenofos. It reminds me of my first ever RP, where my poor elf nailed her foot to the floor with a misplaced arrow.” – Serala

“Varanis is likely pretty pissed right now.” – Varanis

“We’re clearing the tower.” – Berra

“Sponges on sticks with dipped with vinegar add an entire new thing to the ‘I thirst’ line in the bible.” – Rajar

“If that’s someone who wishes harm, two people now know.” – Berra
“…and shout really loud…” – Xenofos

“WE KNOW!” – Berra
“Then I’ll yell, “BACK DOWN,” behind me, so Rajar can hear.” – Berra
“New enemies – downstairs!!!!” – Xenofos

“You fluky bastard! Take a tick on POW.” – GM

“GM, you giant twat!” – Serala.

“Shit.” – Serala

“You can make a counterattack.” – GM
“GOD YES.” – Serala
“Hypothetically, just in case it comes up, how does one roll for divine intervention?” – Dormal

“And cutting away…” – GM
“MMMMM!!!” – Serala

“What’s worse – it came out as ‘Dom, you giant twat’. I’m clearly too used to insulting my husband…” – Serala
“I heard ‘GM’ so I’m used to him being insulted.” – Berra
“I’ve spent years RPing with/insulting GM too, to be fair.” – Serala

“I got him! I got him! (Recover dignity and head downstairs towards whatever my detect enemy points me to.)” – Varanis

“OW.” – Berra

“I am glad I am not in the front rank.” – Xenofos
“Front rank is PAINFUL right now.” – Berra

“Please tell me that Koraki is moving his ass now?” – Varanis

“SO STORM BULL!” – Berra
“So sensible.” – Berra

“‘Vinga!’ Leaping my way down the stairs!” – Varanis

“Should I do the thing?” – Rajar
“NO!” – Berra

“Speaking as someone who will be mistaken for a corpse, go for it.” – Dormal

“I think there should be a Detect Patient spell.” – Mellia

“This could only be a visual illusion really.” – Berra
“Wait – there are two Onjurs?” – Varanis
“There SHOULD be only one.” – Berra
“Yes.” – Rajar
“No. There should be none!” – Varanis
“I’m with Varanis on this!” – Serala

“I will axe the sleeping person…” – Rajar demonstrates Storm Bull thinking ahead
“Let’s go for the one on the left. It’s more likely to be the real thing. I can’t see Onjur doing anything right.” – Mellia

“I don’t know how to look that up.” – Berra

*leg is nearly chopped off* – Serala
“You’re fine! Walk it off.” – Dormal

“Grandfather’s going to kill her himself for wasting his healing potion on someone else. I believe the deal was ‘Go if you must, but come back intact’….” – Serala

“GOOD LUCK!” – Berra

“Yep. Berserk.” – Rajar

“33 out of 42 on Dodge.” – Mellia
“#TeamMellia” – Berra

“How long does it take me to get down the stairs? Still leaping!” – Varanis
“I think Serzeen is the one on the right.” – Berra
“Suddenly, I’m glad I’ve not made it into the room yet.” – Varanis

“It’s not anyhow.” – Berra
“It’s a 20 after you go to 100.” – Berra
“I thought I was doing well at 85….” – Serala
“I suddenly feel feak and weeble…” – Serala

“MELLIA!” – Berra
“Yeah, me too.” – Varanis
“But Varanis, you have pretty armour!” – Serala

“Xenofos is getting hustled away and then I’m heading back towards Rajar.” – Berra

“Blood splattered pretty armour.” – Varanis

“What the heck just happened…” – Xenofos

“Serzeen is going for a knockback…” – GM
“I’m going to try to disarm him. Called shot, left arm.” – Berra

“GM’s a meaniehead who makes us wait out turn! 0_0” – Serala

“Storm Bull………………………..” – Rajar

“I don’t want to think about what Grandmother will do to Rajar if he kills Serzeen.” – Varanis

“Tiwr!!!” – Serala
“Sadly, Tiwr isn’t here…” – Varanis
“We could’ve cut off his horn and brought it with us? :smiley:” – Serala

“This gets the job done, right?” – Berra
“Now I just have to survive the next round.” – Berra

“Am I downstairs yet?” – Varanis
“Probably, Varanis.” – Berra
“I suspect I’m standing in the doorway staring in horror.” – Varanis

“STORM BULL!” – Berra

“2 points of heal!” – Berra

“Staunched the wound on the left arm!” – Berra
“Hurrah! Humakti heal scarring!” – Rajar

“The Storm Bulls have a ritual for when he comes round. I will need beer.” – Berra

“And I’ll check on Serzeen, and slowly wind down from being ready to kill Rajar to save people.” – Berra

“Berra’s still vibrating with her sword perfectly still.” – Berra

“Hah, gone also.” – Berra
“LOL” – Nala
“Um, is the skull guy Onjur?” – Nala

“Also, why do I miss all the sessions with combat?!” – Nala
“Good sense.” – Berra

“Rajar’s sheet is all on paper, which is not my normal drift at all. I do seem to be going very old school for RQG for no apparant reason.” – Rajar
“It’s bronze age. I demand you use papyrus.” – Berra
“Well Rajar can’t read. I should really memorise it all in verse.” – Rajar

  • 1
    Charrington, in her usual sardonic fashion, observes that here the poet was clearly either hiccuping or was drunk as the proverbial unicorn. See., e.g., Catullus 27 (
  • 2
    There is no direct evidence to support the hypothesis that the Xenofos named in the sonnets would be the author Xenofos whose lost history The Fall has been paraphrased by later historians of late Lunar Empire.
  • 3
    A male protagonist in Esrolian warrior poetry might indicate that males occasionally had a more significant role in military affairs than hitherto assumed by the majority of scholars. Whether said Xenofos is representative of a larger male warrior group ignored by other sources in matriarchal society, a break in the societal and cultural norms of his day or – most likely – sarcastic critique of the values of Esrolian hero poetry, ridiculing their normal protagonists and their ideology by carnivalistically presenting the most unlikely hero possible, remains subject to further study and even then, due to the fragmentary nature of our sources, may regrettably not be conclusively solved.
  • 4
    This verse is highly debated as it seems entirely out of character for the Berra of Berra JarangsdottiHumaktisaga. Of course, that saga is thought to consist of an enormous amount of hyperbole.
  • 5
    This is presumably ironic, as Berra’s God was Humakt, his good healing may well be death.