Berra — Fear In The Dark
1627, Fire Season
Early Fire Season, in Tarsh. [[[s02:session-40|Session 40]]]
Berra and Valseena relieve Rajar and Xenofos from watch pretty much in the middle of the night. While Rajar assures nothing has been moving or rumbling except maybe for his starving belly Xenofos remains quiet.
After Stormbull lumbers to the sleeping area scribe remains behind.
Berra asks, “Are you getting some sleep?” It seems she has missed a hint.
“Soon. Can we have a word?” scribe answers quietly.
“Sure.” Berra gestures out. “Let’s walk the perimeter.” It is a suggestion more than a demand.
Scholar takes off his helmet and combs his hair with his fingers. “Right. “
Berra sets off at the slow, quiet pace of the scout.1For once, Move Quietly agrees.
There are no sounds from the soft boots of the Esrolian.2Xenofos gets a special on Move Quietly.
“I talked with Varanis earlier.” he says softly.
“About?” Berra looks worried, instantly.3Berra rolls Insight (Human) for Xenofos.
“You had a training mishap? How are you doing?” Scribe continues quietly.
A flash of fear on Berra’s face is gone a moment later. “Fine now. It’s good of you to worry. But I’m fine.”
“She said you were quite upset.” He sighs “I hope you are truthful and not just brave there.”
“I was. I had a real shock. It was bad for a moment, and then it was over – she’s the one who got hurt.” The fear is not quite there on the surface, but it does underlay what she is saying.
“Accidents happen in training and in battle. It is the way of the sword.” Scribe says. “I did get scared when I heard. But she lives and rides on with nothing more then a stiff neck I hope.”
Berra keeps on walking, but that does not seem to have soothed her. “She should just heal it and be… I didn’t want to finish it because my healing can leave scars. But it was bad, and I should have been in control.” She looks less fine now.
“Are we ever really?” scribe asks. ” Yes, you should have. You were not, if you say so. Worst was avoided. Sorry. That is not very comforting I guess.”(edited)
Berra sighs. “I don’t need comfort. But thank you for trying.” Whatever she is thinking is still occupying her, but deeper now, as her Humakti calm comes onto her. Within moments there is nothing but the professional warrior there.
“I am more concerned of her this time to be honest. Her and our mission to save her sister. She was pretty shocked by that brush with Humakt and seemed to be sinking into despair.” Scribe says in quiet, calm tone.
Berra nods, taking that in. “She is concerned she is not treated with full respect in Kallyr’s court,” she adds quietly.
“I don’t know of that. I just know her loyalty to Kallyr is beyond any reproach. And right now that is immaterial anyhow. We need to get past unknown number of Tarshians to even see Mirava.” He stops.”If she loses her confidence that it can be done it may become impossible. Or you for that matter.”
“If she loses me?” Berra looks confused. “Oh. I think I see what you mean. Yeah. I can talk to her about what happened, if you want? There’s a thing she doesn’t know, but I don’t know if it’ll help her.”
“I meant if you lose your confidence, little cousin. She needs to look forward. Be Vinga. Find the Other Way, protect the woman. Not wallow in ways we might fail. I tried to remind her of that.” he pauses to think “Use your own judgement in addressig her, little cousin. But you would anyway. She did not blame you. Nor do I. But please help in fixig the damage. To both of you, if need be.”
“Oh, yeah. No, I’m not going to. I have a thing to think about, but that’s not a problem for you. That’s a greatsword thing, not a broadsword thing. I’m pretty sure it would not have happened with a broadsword. It was because I didn’t take the sword seriously. Seriously enough. But I’ll try to get her to talk to me and see if it’ll help if I say what I was thinking…” Berra, still calm, puts her hand up to have a moment’s time in which to think.
“She had expected to have time to relax. She likes to do a thing then stop,” is what the little Humakti finally comes up with. “And she likes to be told how she has done, I think. That did not happen properly.”
“That can be there somewhere. Who would not. And service should be lauded. But she is afraid of that marriage, afraid of failure and almost dying brought all that to surface.” Scribe reties his helmet. “I don’t know how we’ll pull this off either. But it can’t be worse then Hell. And she did come back from there. We all did.”
“Her fear of failure grows when she does not have time to put it down.” Berra nods to where Valseena is, a little ahead. “We’re here. Anything more to add?”
He shakes his head. “Maybe stay with broadswords and rapiers at practise until we have returned successfully from this quest? Good night Berra. Good night Valseena.”
“Yes,” Berra says with a smile. “I’ve been thinking about the drills. G’night.” Her voice sounds fond.
He nods and vanishes to the night.
Xenofos tells Berra about the fears Varanis has